Baby Loss Awareness Week: Mum who planned funeral for 1 newborn twin while caring for the other, sets up company to help women overcome trauma

When Hyacinth Myers gave birth to twins, she could not have known that she would only be taking one of them home.

At 23 weeks pregnant, her babies were born prematurely and the youngest twin died at only three weeks old.

She didn’t even get to hold baby Shaka until after he had passed away.

“Because they were so early and so ill, I didn’t get to hug either of them. The youngest one, I never got to hold him until he actually died and then I held him in my arms and he was still warm,” said Hackney-born mum, Hyacinth.

Now, she has launched a company called Empower7 to help other women who have experienced similar traumas.

READ MORE: It’s all for Harry’: London Dad’s running mission to get parents speaking about loss after son’s tragic death at 3 days old

Shaka died suddenly and Hyacinth says they couldn’t find the reason for his death, even after an autopsy.

“We still couldn’t find the cause, he just literally stopped breathing and I think he just probably gave up. Babies… sometimes, they do that,” she said.

She was then left with the awful situation of having to grieve for one son whilst taking care of another.

“It was really hard planning a funeral when you’ve still got a live baby in the hospital, when you’re terrified he’s going to be next,” she said.

Her surviving son, Kwame, was in the hospital for six and a half months, so Hyacinth had to stay focussed on looking after herself in order to look after him and her eldest son, who was seven at the time.

“I was actually trying to be as normal as possible and actually, I was really focused on eating well, meditating, all that stuff.

“[I was] trying to do everything I could do to keep myself sane,” she added.

Baby Shaka was only three weeks old when he passed away

Empowering other grieving parents

Years later, she now uses everything she has learned about trauma to help other women through the aftermath of baby loss, domestic violence and sexual assault.

After spending time reflecting on her coping mechanisms, she now runs workshops, leads talks and has helped with research projects on the subjects as part of her life’s work, Empower7.

She says the whole point is for participants to “just reconnect with ourselves.”

“I’m not actually doing anything really new, I’m just sharing some of the tools and the things that I’ve learned in my life and really helping them to reconnect with who they are and not who they think people want them to be.”

Hyacinth cites her community work background as the reason helping others comes so naturally.

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This month, for Baby Loss Awareness week, she is making memory boxes for parents who have lost a child.

The idea was born during lockdown and each box contains an angel wing keepsake, journals, semi-precious stones and a teddy bear photo frame.

Now 49, Hyacinth is moving forward with her life by channelling her feelings to empower others. She said: “I’ve decided to use my grief to help people. Obviously, I think about him [Shaka] nearly every day.”

“That was a chapter and the chapter now is something different,” she added.

Find her work here .

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My London – Local News